I am okay with it.
|Yup. That's a penis.|
I posted on my Facebook page awhile back that I was trying to get into the "it's a boy" mindset because I had a feeling that's what we'd find out and I wanted to avoid total & utter disappointment. Yes, I am slightly bummed there won't be a little girl in the house. I won't have hair to braid and when I paint nails now, people will look at me funny but it didn't take long to get used to my new reality. I am quickly becoming excited about what three boys will mean for us as a family and what this little guy is going to bring to the party.
There is a very special dynamic in every family and I think families that have children of one gender have an especially unique one. I'm not saying it's for the good or bad, just different. Boys with only brothers have a different experience than they would if one of those brothers was a sister. And vice versa. Girls raised with sisters and no brothers have an experience that would be wholly different if one of them was a boy.
It presents problems and eases some burdens. While I can now be assured I will never own a bathroom that doesn't smell like pee, I also know I will always have help when it comes to moving furniture, taking out the garbage or yard work (when we get one!). I don't think we'll be able to get all three of them in a room together, just because of the age differences but there will always be one room with two of them, at least.
Our little man had more surprises in store for us too. Like being another week ahead of schedule. Yeah. Not even 20 weeks in & we're getting our due date bumped up a second time, this one by five days instead of two. We're now expecting his arrival around August 15. I'm not really complaining about the new due date; if it's accurate, it means I have one week less in the summer heat, grossly pregnant. I can totally live with that.
All that change is based on how big he is. At the time of the ultrasound, I was 19 weeks and 6 days along but he measured out to be the size of a 20-21 week old fetus. He "weighed" about 13 ounces, what my pregnancy calendar claims he should be weighing today, days later, on the first day of week 21.
Honestly, though. I didn't need the ultrasound to tell me, this kid is big. I've been showing for weeks now and I look much farther along than I actually am. I can feel him moving almost constantly & you can see it on the outside now too. I'm getting the boys used to talking to him and trying to let them catch a kick or two but so far, no luck.
We've thought about names and are saving up to store cord blood. I'm going to set up a gift registry for the cord blood so friends and family can help with the costs if they so desire (hint, hint. wink, wink). My mom found a convertible crib set she wants to buy for us and it's one we actually like so of course we said "Yes, please!" There is still SO MUCH preparing to do but really, we've been through this rodeo before; we're not buying all that crap you're convinced you need as a first-timer. NO WAY.
I'm sticking to a few key things we'll need in abundance, like Summer Infant's SwaddleMe wraps. I was thinking about going with the new-school cloth diapers they have out there or at least Honest Company's plant-based disposables. All I know for sure is I'm not going out of my mind, buying shit that will never get used. I'll do what I did with Paxton & find a car seat/stroller combo on Craig's List if I can. I might even be able to find a really good one like an Orbit or a Bugaboo. I'd be willing to spend decent money on those since they will be getting used A LOT and I might actually be able to find a used one around town.
I know the next few months will fly by and baby will be here before we know it but it feels like there is plenty of time. Until I look down or stand up or try to eat. Then I realize how long I still have to go and how much growing we both still have to do. I worry about how big he is, how big he'll get and how my body will handle it. I'm not at risk right now but I'm notorious for developing high blood pressure and pregnancy-induced hypertension around 35 weeks. Both Phoenix & Paxton were induced a few days early and I was on bed rest with both of them; 6 weeks with Phoenix and 1-2 with Paxton.
For now, I'm taking it easy, pacing myself as I get used to my growing belly and shrinking lung capacity. I'm still eating small meals throughout the day to help with my blood sugar and because the Zofram can only do so much if I'm not eating every few hours. Still craving lots of sweets, fruits and juices. Chocolate milk is on the list now too, along with this trail mix I found and Cuties, those little mandarin oranges they market as 'perfect for kids'.
I still haven't gained any weight, even with all the snacking and sweets (probably because of the morning sickness and baby's propensity to steal all my calories and whatnot), making this my tiniest pregnancy ever but I'm sure it's not going to last much longer. For now, the only things that seems to be growing besides my belly are my boobs; I've already jumped from a 34A to a 36B and now, that's starting to feel too small.
IT IS AWESOME. Too bad I can't guarantee they'll stay...
|He's already squished & he still has months of baking left!|
We're heading into the downhill climb and if I remember correctly, this half will crawl by. Then again, maybe I shouldn't be comparing this pregnancy to the last two; it's already been so different. Maybe I'm completely wrong and this last half will go even faster than the first.
We'll just have to wait and see.