Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Coming together again

I haven't talked about my mom on here in over a year. I haven't seen her since Christmas 2012, when I cut her visit short and sent her home early after a blow-out the day after Christmas. 

It wasn't anything she'd done, just a lot of unresolved issues that all came to a head at once. A lifetime of issues. It wasn't a fight I wanted to have but it was one that needed to happen. Dirty laundry needed to be aired, boundaries needed to be laid out; the relationship between us needed to be redefined. 

Since then, we've both had time to ourselves to think & grow in ways we both needed. My mom seems more capable of seeing me as a woman and a mother than ever before; she's taking accountability for things she's done & cannot change; she's showing remorse for the mistakes she's made and is making the effort to be a better her. She's beginning to see that our mistakes don't make us bad people; they give us the chance to change.

I got beautiful letter from her a couple weeks ago & was incredibly touched by the insight she showed. For the first time in a long time, I'm not anxious over our relationship. I feel good about where we're at, right now.

She's coming down for her first visit since that awkward drive to the airport a year and a half ago. She and her boyfriend are setting up camp at a little R.V. park 20 minutes north of town. There's a lake with fish, paddle boats & canoes so Jay & I are going to trek up with the kids to camp for a few nights. 

They should be here sometime today. 

So much seems to have change and I'm getting more & more excited to see her. It's like my mom's been lost for awhile & now, I've finally found her again. I'm hoping I can talk them into coming into town for a bit; I'd like to show her where we're at now, maybe have dinner with the in-laws but no matter what, it will be awesome just to see her.


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