IT'S THE FINAL COUNTDOWN

JESUS CHRIST.

It's been way too long since I've posted. You understand, I know, but I still feel a twinge of guilt at leaving you all hanging for MONTHS.

Well, life and this pregnancy have pretty much taken over EVERYTHING. So much drama with this pregnancy, I'm glad we only have 26 days left. TWENTY SIX DAYS. Less than a month and we'll have the newest little Murphy, Korben Michael.

I've done really well through most of this pregnancy; my biggest complaint being my irritability. I am your worst nightmare right now. Vastly pregnant and raging like a bull in the blink of an eye. Then there's the other side to that coin: the tears. I cry over EVERYTHING, including being totally, irrationally emotional. Yeah, it's been awesome.

My emotional state as been hard for everyone to deal with and life hasn't been all rainbows & sunshine. A few storms have broken over us but we've weathered them and come out the other side. Phoenix has been having an especially hard time because he can see I'm not my usual self. We've butted heads HARD and I've felt like an absolute failure more often than I care to admit lately.

I know I'm not in my right mind but that doesn't make it easier to deal with shit; it just leaves me more frustrated because I feel like I should have the patience, knowing it's not really my fault or the kids'. AH, brain. You are so awesome...

Good news is we've had a ton of help in getting ready for Korben's arrival. It's been so humbling. I realize how lucky I am to have so many wonderful people in my life, people I am so proud to call friends. We also have family coming in from out of town to help out; Jay's Grammy Murphy and my mom will both be here to help us celebrate and make sure we survive the first week or two. We're hoping his dad & step-mom can make it out too.

There's no better excuse for a little family reunion than a new baby, right?

Well, that's all I can manage right now; kids are screaming upstairs and Jay should be home soon. I'm not going to say I'll be back soon because chances are pretty good I won't be. I'll try to stay in touch & maybe I'll even get a couple folks to guest post for me so you all aren't left in the lurch for another 3 months.

Until then, be good to yourselves and each other.